Job Title

code monkeyI was going to put “software engineer” on my business cards, but was told that it was too boring — there is a tradition at Apple to make up your own job title. So I thought I would make it “Programmer-Engineer-Thing”. But then a co-worker showed me his, which I like far better: “Sr. Code Monkey”.

I don’t want to copy his, but I am no longer satisfied with my original idea. So now I eagerly await your suggestions…

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38 Responses to “Job Title”

  1. kryx September 29, 2005 at 3:05 pm #

    Wow, that was neat! The only other thing I can think of is “Byte Junkie.” Or if you want to sound versatile, “Byte Junkie, etc.” But no logo to go with it.
    :-/

  2. kryx September 29, 2005 at 3:06 pm #

    at least it sounds like “monkey” hah!

  3. Kevin Barrow September 29, 2005 at 3:14 pm #

    Master of Code Fu
    (or Code Foo)
    Servant of the Programming Overlords
    Software Engineer (who likes pie)
    10 A$ = “SOFTWARE ENGINEER”
    20 PRINT “I AM A ” A$
    30 END
    The “All Your Code Are Belong To Me” Guy
    Yo, yo, yo! I *am* the Mac Daddy!
    Code Artiste
    And, in honor of last night:
    Code Ninja
    Code Pirate
    Code Zombie

  4. Hutch September 29, 2005 at 5:44 pm #

    What do you think of
    “Purveyor of all that is coded”

  5. Jason September 29, 2005 at 6:45 pm #

    Those all sound too pretentious.
    How about President?

  6. Noelle September 29, 2005 at 7:27 pm #

    I am always partial to “evil overlord”, but maybe that’s more me than you…
    There’s “Zool” (as in “there is no God, only Zool”).
    You could simply put “codeliscious”.
    and then again, “sardonic code warrior” really does make a point…
    Let us know what you decide.

  7. Noelle September 29, 2005 at 7:30 pm #

    “Code, Incarnate”

  8. Sami September 29, 2005 at 8:39 pm #

    I’m not going to contribute a suggestion, because I can’t think of anything, but man! Apple sounds like a really cool place to work.
    I like Master of Code Fu.

  9. Aki September 29, 2005 at 10:02 pm #

    Code Stategerist?
    Actually, based on the last cleanup job you did, I’d call you a Code Janitor :)

  10. kryx September 29, 2005 at 11:15 pm #

    Did you want “code” to be in there? :-/

  11. mike Abrahamsohn September 29, 2005 at 11:34 pm #

    1 2 installer

  12. randall September 30, 2005 at 7:18 am #

    “Particle Physicist, Rock Star, Neurosurgeon, etc.”

  13. GregB September 30, 2005 at 7:40 am #

    Um, how about “Priest in the temple of Unix” or “At the right hand of Jobs” or “Software Convergence Engineer”?

  14. Dave MacLachlan September 30, 2005 at 9:40 am #

    My personal title that I’ve used for the few times that I’ve gotten to choose my title has been “Binary Composer”. So don’t steal that one ;-)
    How obscure do you want to go?
    char title[] = { 103, 110, 111, 105, 106, 32, 107, 105, 105, 113, 32, 0};
    or you could go British (as in a titled noble)
    Lord Jon Marquis of Code
    or just plain
    Sir (or Master)
    or
    007
    Getting lame so I’m going to stop now….

  15. Dave MacLachlan September 30, 2005 at 9:44 am #

    or instead of “Code” using something different…
    Silicon Ninja? Silicon Pirate?
    Object Orienteer?

  16. nstryker September 30, 2005 at 10:03 am #

    i like mac daddy a lot, but it’s probably been done to death.

  17. Aki September 30, 2005 at 11:09 am #

    Sir Fix-A-Lot
    “I Like Big Bugs and I cannot lie..!”

  18. Noelle September 30, 2005 at 1:33 pm #

    Jon, Aki has gone insaine. It’s not his fault really, he just got married. Anyway, just pretend taht last comment didn’t happen… Jesus teaches us to forgive, right? ;-)

  19. kryx September 30, 2005 at 5:00 pm #

    WOW! So many comments already! Amusing titles too. “Silicon Pirate” totally made me laugh. Very nice Mr. Dave!
    I hope Jon doesn’t end up with “Code Red”.. =/

  20. Dave MacLachlan September 30, 2005 at 5:03 pm #

    Silicon Samurai
    or
    “The Dynamic Uno!”
    Waiting on lots of builds today….

  21. Liz September 30, 2005 at 11:32 pm #

    Code Cronie

  22. Will Walsh October 1, 2005 at 3:29 pm #

    Sir Hackalot
    Licensed Hacker
    Coder of the Holy Grail
    Programming Underwriter
    Man Behind the Curtain

  23. Rob October 2, 2005 at 9:56 pm #

    Create Your own if you like
    http://www.bullshitjob.com/titles.html
    I like “Forward Functionality Producer” or “Senior Paradigm Orchestrator”

  24. Will Walsh October 4, 2005 at 5:35 pm #

    another, slightly dated, thought –
    Binary Battalion Commander

  25. Mike October 5, 2005 at 3:46 pm #

    Here are a few more, in no particular order:
    International Man of Mystery,
    Plumber,
    Advocate of Order and Reason,
    Necessary Evil,
    Catalyst,
    Contortionist,
    Holistic Debugger,
    Skeptic
    … and my current business card title:
    Mr Right Now

  26. Noelle October 6, 2005 at 10:44 am #

    Ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh! I like “Necessary Evil”!!!

  27. Noelle October 6, 2005 at 11:14 am #

    **Marching around chanting “Necessary Ev-il! Necessary Ev-il!” in hopes that Jon hasn’t picked on yet…**

  28. Jan October 6, 2005 at 3:18 pm #

    oh be still my heart – was that a Buckaroo Banzai mention up there by randall? (sorry Jon – it’s not always about you! LOL)
    Anyway, how about “Flying Spaghetti Monster of All That Is Mac”?

  29. kryx October 7, 2005 at 7:35 pm #

    Piggybacking on Jan’s, how would it be if you used “Mac and Me”?

  30. Helen October 8, 2005 at 6:10 pm #

    Just here reading and laughing! :-D

  31. andrew Silk October 10, 2005 at 12:02 am #

    doulos slave, IWORK doulos… its the greek word for slave.. i’m sure there are lots cofo combinations of it….

  32. Chris October 10, 2005 at 11:11 pm #

    My suggestions:
    1. Dominus Functator
    2. Freelance Heating Engineer

  33. randall October 12, 2005 at 12:00 pm #

    Yep, that was a BB reference, good catch Jan! I wondered if anyone would ;) It was a toss up between that or “Oscillation Overthruster Engineer” but I thought that would be too obvious.

  34. RM October 13, 2005 at 2:27 pm #

    how about “minister of macros”…”pastor of programming”…”levite of log-on”…”maximus programius”?

  35. Helen October 16, 2005 at 1:38 pm #

    Jon, so which one did you choose??? C’mon ya gotta tell us!!!

  36. Noelle October 19, 2005 at 4:14 pm #

    JON!
    You are totally killing us with this! Will you put out with the decision already???? :-D
    N

  37. Jon Reid October 19, 2005 at 6:15 pm #

    I was actually hoping to post an image from the real thing, whenever I get them…

  38. Noelle November 9, 2005 at 10:12 am #

    Yeah, ok… I have waited nearly a month. Jon, I beg of you, for all that is good and funny in the world, tell us!

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